How Surroundings Influence Self-Discovery: The Secret to Protecting Your Energy
Why Your Environment Holds the Key to Unlocking Your Best Self
What if the key to unlocking your best self isn't in your mindset—but in the environment you're living in?
The tides are changing. I just went through an eye-opening program (which I will be doing a review here in the next couple of weeks), and it got me thinking about the things I enjoy writing about.
Personal growth can be very serious, and very rewarding… yet it can also feel like it’s very difficult to do. There’s an urgency culture that surrounds all things today, including personal development and it pushes us to do everything faster. But you can’t rush self-discovery, or growing into a new being, that’s the one thing you have to present with, aware of and in tune with. One thing holds true in all of my years of being in this industry, one thing is FOR CERTAIN.
Every time I step into a different environment, I feel differently about myself. And I guess you can call that a hack, or secret, yet, no one talks about this. I’ve been fortunate enough to travel and live in different areas of the world, and it never really dawned on me that this may be one of the key factors for a very in-tune self-discovery project. (I realize how I’ve never explored these lessons in my writing, a 2025 objective maybe? :) )
In the most recent years, I’ve been driving all over Ontario (Canada) for different health reasons but also to experience new things, and I’ve been testing out my theory. When I first moved to my current location (2021), I never thought the environment played such a big role I thought it was all mind over matter, mindset, or willpower. I believed that the outside world had no real impact on growth, and who I was becoming, an impact on my being.
When I moved here, I was faced with a very subtle toxic environment. I had to ask myself, does the environment play that much of a role in who we become as women?
And for all those years, of “mind setting” my way through life, I was wrong, environment does matter.
Now let's define what “environment” is meant to mean: the circumstances, objects, or conditions by which one is surrounded. (Merriam-Webster). And for me, I could easily advocate that that’s what it meant, and I understand why now, I felt like the environment had no true impact on our being. I had never considered beyond this, I always looked at the external surroundings: landscape, country, nature, houses, and seasons.
Our environment is SO MUCH more than this. I had to take a hard look at the people I was surrounded with, the media I listened to, the people I befriended or followed on social media, the vibe of the town/city, their core values, their innovations (or lack of) and the habits that encompass a community. Those also form part of our environment.
Woahw, so many things to reflect on and think about. This is a whole lot of responsibility I’ve just added to my plate. I need to place myself in an environment that’s conducive to me, my goals and my well-being. That felt like a lot of self-centeredness, and a lot of ego and so that was kinda of scary. To take that much responsibility for my own life, and my surroundings… not being able to blame it on anyone by my choices. Throughout the program I mentioned earlier, I was faced with a deep Truth that this is the way God intended us to be; part of an environment that’s conducive to our growth and wellbeing, which would also mean his wellbeing.
So how do we evaluate one’s current environment? I guess ultimately it’s about slowing down and really paying attention at the people we are around, and how we feel around them.
If we are surrounded by negative people, we will become negative. If we are surrounded by concrete, our hearts will become like stone. If we are surrounded by noise, our minds will always be racing.
Yet, the opposite is also true, if we are surrounded by flowers, our hearts will blossom. If we are surrounded by women who value other women, we’ll value ourselves. If we are surrounded by slowness, quietness and beauty, our life will feel good and full.
And this got me thinking, what if WE are not depressed, anxious, unmotivating or unambitious…. what if it’s our environment that’s taming our soul, or at least playing a part in doing so?
“If you stay in environments where people don’t recognize the value of you, you will shrink your gift to the size of what they can stand. And that is what causes anxiety, depression and stress because you have to shrink.” -unknown
The media we read, the movies we listen to, the music… all of it matters in the expression and the making of who we are.
A home with a lot of beauty, intentionality, growth, freshness, big vibe people.. will bring much of the same. If our environment has a lot of darkness, noise, artificial light, mess, hustle, and manipulative women.. our souls will feel suffocated.
This is where women shine, where we get to create environments that nurture growth, love, value and fulfilment. We get to create our environment, at least in our homes… transform your physical space if you have too, or a corner of the home that is completely yours: lighting, décor, colors, plants.
As a creator, a wife, a writer… always becoming the best version of me is at the forefront of my mind. But if my environment doesn’t allow me to expand myself in ways I could have never imagined… I’m not at the right place. If I don’t allow myself to meet myself in a different environment to see how I feel about myself, I’m robbing myself of the joys of meeting who I can be…
Our energy is the most beautiful asset we have been born with, we are born worthy of feeling the most magical life.. and our energy is an important key to this. Our energy is our life force, and if we get caught in an environment where our energy, our well-being can’t expand and are suffocated… that’s not helping us or anyone else. Preserving our energy helps us align with our passions, our life's work, and our greater sense of fulfillment.
Make the space you have your own. Make it matter to you. Bring some beauty back into your life. Recognize that that’s where everything starts. This is where you get to protect your energy with all you’ve got.
This was my single most important lesson of 2024 - your energy is the most important thing to protect from others, and from the world. This is the foundation for maintaining a better emotional, mental and physical well-being.
Protect your energy with all you’ve got… the world tries to steel that, which is the most precious part of you🤍
Here are other steps you can take to protect your energy,
1- Set Boundaries with the people and situations that drain you, or that are not conducive to an amazing environment. No need to cut people off or burn bridges but limit time spent with them, and love them from afar.
2- The more present you can be with others and with yourself, you have a secret weapon to detect what needs to be changed, or altered. Be present.
3- Recharge and refresh by taking time alone with yourself and set aside some quiet time. Some people enjoy energy cleansing, like smudging or taking salt baths… but it is not necessary unless it makes you feel good, and like you can breathe/expand. I love to organize or clean. And sometimes I enjoy create a whole vibe of relaxation, almost like a spa setting in my home. I also enjoy a lot of nature walks, sitting in the back yard listening to birds, eating desert on the deck and enjoying the sun. You know you, and if you don’t experiment and see what calms your nervous system.
4- A good way is also to ground as much as you can. When you are in tune with nature, the cycles, the animals and the earth's aether, it allows you to reconnect to your body and the regeneration of life. These can look like barefoot walks, gardening, sunbathing, bird watching, cat snuggling or even star gazing.
5- Gratitude for everything - a whole new post will come from this (a course review and lessons learned) by the end of the month.
6- Digital Detox - need a say more? Minimizing social media, media or the internet is beneficial for your energy, for your mind, for your health and your wellbeing. In our house, we try and do max 1 hour a day but we don’t always accomplish that.. Media really influences our perception of the world and ourselves, it is the number one thing that can keep us stuck in feeling not so good. It shapes our energy or well-being, especially if you feel overwhelmed by constant digital stimuli.
What environment are you currently surrounded by, and how is it impacting your energy? Take one small step today—whether it’s clearing the clutter around you or stepping outside for fresh air—to create space for the energy and growth you deserve.
Take time to look at your environment—what is it reflecting back to you? Is it fueling your growth, or is it draining your energy? Start the year off on the right food, recognize the power of your surroundings, protect your energy, protect your growth, and make space for the life you are meant to live.
I’ve been reflecting on 2024, and the past 10 years of my journey in personal growth, and it’s been quite interesting to witness my evolution and the timing of it all. 2024 was a huge year (when is it not?)!
On a personal level, my Nana was admitted to the hospital to then transferred to a nursing home, my husband was recovering from vertigo and debilitating back pains, this was our first full year in business, and we did car camping several times to save money, we bought a new car, we drove 17x last year to health appointments over 12 hours away (round trip), I started fostering kittens, I’ve transformed my home into a sanctuary, learned more about homesteading and crochet, healed some of my nervous system and hormonal imbalances, got a lung infection, went to my first bed & breakfast… I mean there’s plenty more to say. And I’m in awe that all this happened, I thought at first 2024 was pretty boring, but looking back I realize that it was a pretty big year.
Side note: I encourage you to do the same, I thought my year was mediocre, and turns out I did a lot. Reflect on your year.
I’m so proud of the growth and evolution that my husband (Scott) and I have overcome. I’m ready this year to experience something entirely different. Something new, something grand, a new adventure. My Indiana Jones era.
And so here we are, the expectations and “goals” for this year are simple… along with becoming a better writer, storyteller and chronicler… I may even enter a contest this year.. who knows? I will focus on becoming more charismatic, magnetic and zhuzhing my writing up. I’ve been working on self-leadership these past couple of years, and I feel like I’m in my aphrodite era. This year I will have so many more adventures mixed in with becoming better at crochet. #grannyera
Looking at goals and expectations, I also had to look at the things I had to put in place to make this happen- in my environment. The most important thing for this to even be a possibility is to put more boundaries are place and say more “no’s”.
Side note: This is something that’s also been misused without really proper understanding of what that means. To set proper boundaries, there has to be a lot of self-discovery and understanding, without it… you can fall flat on “My Word is law” (which will be another piece written in the first quarter of this year). Most of our self-leadership falls first on knowing ourselves, and a lot of people are not so willing to do that. Even though I believe it is such a beautiful journey when we get to rediscover ourselves and how God created us, there’s a piece of magic that can only be found in this piece of the puzzle.
There is a lot on the horizon when it comes to 2025, in my writing, in my adventures, in business and health. I’m looking forward to this year… And I hope you do too!
Steph xo
Contemplation: I feel like there are a lot of questions that are brought up in the first part of this piece, so some of them will feel repetitive. Which part of the house gives you anxiety? Clean it and make it feel fresh. Is your circle of friends uplifting? Are the people around you in good spirits (even your family members)? Do you enjoy your neighborhood and view? Do you know what values your community holds? Do you feel like an oddball where you live? Is your nervous system at peace around the people you surround yourself with? Do you need to purge and clean out some stuff around the house? Do you need to donate more stuff to feel more freshness in the home? Have you set boundaries with people and upheld them? How many times a day do you feel grateful for what you have? How many hours a day do you spend on social media? Do you ground? Which ways feel like self-care, that you enjoy? Are you present in the creation of your life?